1. Craigslist rabbi.

2. Hip reverend who only preaches through righteous guitar solos.

3. Anyone found at a pier.

4. Some guy at the train station holding a giant cross.

5. Dog we taught how to open a Bible.

6. Doesn’t matter, so long as it’s a political statement.

7. Priest so elderly he might have a stroke before the vows.

8. Resentful sister.

9. Nettles Dewbeam, Church of the Holy Tree Sap.

10. Your ex.