1. Argues in favor of the oft-ignored “Forest Fire” theme.

2. Keeps asking groom if he’s been circumcised.

3. Gives you a discount punch card.

4. Immediately recommends a good plastic surgeon.

5. Office located in between a marijuana dispensary and a Quik Loan.

6. First thing she says is, ”Well I guess this’ll do.”

7. Business card includes graphic of a monster truck.

8. At end of meeting says “there’s always a tell for whether couples will last or not” and refuses to elaborate.

9. Keeps complaining about her ex-husbands, 1, 2, and 5 especially.